Funny Friday

With the recent release of The Simpsons Movies in theaters, I thought it was an appropriate time to turn to Homer Simpson for some words of wisdom. Simpsons fan or not, his “wisdom” is funny. Feel free to share your own favorite moments from the show whether they involve Homer, or any of the other characters. I’ve also included a YouTube video that’s a compilation of Homer’s funniest moments. Happy Friday!

From the mouth of Homer Simpson…

  • Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.
  • Maybe, just once, someone will call me “Sir” without adding, “You’re making a scene.”
  • What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
  • Marge, you’re as beautiful as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda.
  • Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably.  The lesson is, never try.
  • Operator! Give me the number for 911!
  • Bart, with $10,000, we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love!
  • I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me Superman.
  • Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
  • Marge, don’t discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn.  It’s what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.
  • Doughnuts. Is there anything they can’t do?
  • All my life, I’ve had one dream, to achieve my many goals.
  • Dad, you’ve done a lot of great things, but you’re a very old man, and old people are useless.
  • “To Start, Press Any Key.” Where’s the ANY key?
  • I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.